［Unit Project 1］Believe My Inner Voice

   My artificial is a beak. The length is 63cm, the size is 93cm and the high is 73cm. That color is beige, but I put on the sticker patter of white marble like real stones. This desk was taken off a shelf which was on the desk board. Some goods are put on the desk.

   This desk was bought by my mother and father. In general, this type of desk was given to child who will enter the elementary school. But I got it when I was a third-grade elementary school student. The reason is that I have a young brother. My parents thought that it is better to buy two desks at once. That day, desks were carried into my house. I felt like I got an only my house! I put my textbooks and some favorite toys on the desk. At that time, I got a special and secret place in my house. When I under the desk, I felt that I got into a world of dream. I lived in another world different from that of my family lived. When I was there, I became a resident of a world of dream. 

   I became a junior high school student. I wanted to be wiser. I spent many times with my desk. I tried to study hard with it. One of the reasons that I was able to enjoy studying is I like my desk. It was like a best friend. So, I always tried to keep it clean. Sometime, I decorated according to the seasons like dressing a doll.

   I became a high school student. The time was pasted really quickly, and when I noticed, I had become a third-grade student in high school. I had to study for university entrance exams. 

   That day I have to surely fish studying English and World History. Let’s start in a hurry, I thought. I set at the desk and started studying like I always do. After thirty minutes, I was wondered that I feel so tired. Let’s look at a smartphone for a while. I picked up my smartphone and started to use it. After a while, I took my eyes off my smartphone. The clock worked much times longer than the time I spent studying. I started studying in a hurry. However, for some reasons I can’t focus on studying. I should be in a hurry. Why I can’t focus on studying? I thought a messy desk make me lose my motivation. So, let’s clean up my desk. I dropped all things on the desk. Immediately, floor became no place for feet. 

   After a few minutes, someone knocked my room door. It was my mother. 
     "What are you doing without studying!" 
     "Oh..."  

I felt like a child who played a prank and wanted to hid them.    
     "I…ah…I just cleaning to study more comfortable in my desk!!"     
     "Hmm…If you don't study enough at yourself, …why don’t you go to cram school?"  
What! What did she say!
     "No!!! I don’t want to go there!! I know I can’t focus on studying there than here!!"    
No! No! No! I don’t want to go to cram school. 
     "Ok, I see. …But if you get bad score, I’ll put you in there."

My mother went out of the room. I was in a panic. I needed to get good score. But I couldn’t focus on studying in my desk!! I need a clean desk. A clean desk I need. I thought so strangely. I immediately started cleaning again.

   How many times had passed? After I finish cleaning, the time was already next day. I didn’t study enough today. But it is ok. It’s ok. That I got clean studying space!! Let’s do my best starting tomorrow. I’m ok. I could do it. I went to bed. But after the next day and the next day, I couldn’t study enough at my desk. Some ideas came to my mind. This study environment does not suite me. I can’t study enough my desk at all. Probably I have to change my studying environment. But I ignored these ideas because I still had a confidence that I could study well at my desk same as I always do. I hid my impatience and anxiety that come from not able to study with the belief that I would be able to do it tomorrow. 

   The time was July. It was the time to start last summer vacation in high school. I was feeling anxious. I had not studied enough because I was always busy for preparing some school events. I just felt anxious that the time to start summer vacation It was a last chance to improve my score.
   The day before the summer vacation, one of my friends said that 
     "Why don’t you study with me during summer vacation?"
She suggested the school and library as study place.

     "Ugh...I want, uhm..."
I wanted study at home because I can’t focus on studying when I am in the public place. I concerned about the sounds and presence of people around me. And I still thought that I can good work at home. I wanted to try to study at home again, and want to get success this time. My friends looked my face and say, 
     "I don't like study alone that's why we are examinee. Don't you think so?"
I could understand friends feeling well. I really agree her idea. I felt like I will be able to lose my anxious feelings if I study with my friend. And some ideas were whispered to my mind. It is good opportunity to change your study environment. I believed it. 
     ".... OK! Let's study hard together!"

   During the summer vacation, I always went to school early. And after closed the school, we went to the library. I kept this routine at the end of March. At beginning, I felt uncomfortable about noises. But I noticed that other students was really focused on their studying. It motivated me a lot. When the summer vacation was over, I was able to focus on studying really long hours that I didn’t expect. So, the time to study in my desk was lost.

   My desk was special and comfortable place for me. It is really difficult to leave such place. However, if I felt that I am in the not good environment, I need to change my environment with brave.

   From my experience, I have two critical issues.
   First, we have to think again about the culture of giving a desk for a first-grade elementary school child. In Japan, there is a custom that parents or relatives give a desk to child who will enter the elementary school. Children will be happy that they get own desk. However, children grow up really quickly. When they became upper grades, some children would not fit their body at the desk. In addition, it is difficult to curry out such big desk from the house for throwing it away or being it to recycle shop. If the desk continues to be used for such reasons, it is burden for children to keep using the desk which didn’t fit them. There are possibility to make a bad influence for children studying. Therefore, it is better to buy a desk not only for childhood child but also child can be used for a long time. 

   Second, students should avoid to use cafes for studying. Recent years, number of students who study cafe or library has been increasing. However, studying in a cafe have a probability to reduce its sales. When one student orders only a cup of coffee, and spends a long time for studying at the shop’s table, it will be clearly reduced the sales. Studying at cafe become a nuisance to shops. It is better to use a library other than cafe. These days, as the number of younger who read a book has been decreasing, fewer youngers will use libraries. However, if students use libraries for studying, the number of libraries users will increase. It will be revitalized each region. On the other hand, students have profit that they can study comfortable temperature all seasons and get quiet environment that easy to concentrate on studying. For these reasons, it is better for students to use libraries instead of using cafe.